Lecter

Does anyone still check on me here? I have a new blog: https://wierstamann.net/

I will probably continue using this page for poetry, when I come up with more, but the political stuff will be there. There is also more about how to contact me and other places to read what I write. Come hang out with me.

This is a repost from my WordPress, because I feel like more people will care about this topic here.

I’m periodically active on Tumblr, although not with anything map after 2018, and I often see discourse around the term “fujoshi”. This word, literally meaning “rotten woman”, appeared as a derogatory term in Japan, targeting women who like yaoi or male/male pairings in general. “Rotten” because the homophobic men who made it up didn’t want to have relationships with women who have a positive view on male homosexuality. As it often happens, the term was reclaimed and turned into an empowering label. Years after it spawned male and gender neutral variants, “fudanshi” and “fujin” accordingly. Western yaoi fans and m/m shippers (a shipper is a person who imagines fictional characters as a couple) picked up on it. Some people identifying with this term, mostly preteen and young teen girls back in 00s, created a bit of a bad reputation for it, by extending shipping onto real life gay men and making insensitive comments about them. That trend ended quickly, these girls grew up, and the new generation already knew better. However, up to this date antis on Tumblr hate fujoshi and accuse them of inappropriate behavior. Here are some examples:

“mlm happiness and saftey > fujoshi’s feelings” via mlmsouji

“fujoshis are terrible. all gay people hate fujoshis. fictional gay people hate them too. even the characters they ship hate them. marvelous.” via lesbiananti (not a troll, mind you, but a known blogger who’s also antimap)

“(op was a transmed so im stealing the post) if you support fujoshi culture and sexualize gay/bi men then unfollow me because i do not respect or care for you.” via yamchass



via kissesofaprincess

Do you see the same thing I see? Quite similar, only watered down, pettyposting that antis also engage in on map topics. Just swap “gay men” for “kids” and you get it. While it’s an established fact that the overwhelming majority of modern day fujoshi don’t act inappropriately with gay men, don’t sexually harass anyone, and keep their fantasies appropriately tagged. The similarities between anti fujoshi and anti map behavior don’t end here. In both cases you can discreetly descibe a respectful fujoshi (a woman who has m/m pairings) or an anti contact map (a person who’s attracted to children, but won’t act on it because they don’t want to traumatize them), the anti’s attitude might be more favorable. I’ve seen both situations myself. But it’s the “sin” of identifying with the label of a fujoshi or a map that makes them go wild. On a side note, no, dropping either of these labels won’t lessen the harassment, siding with other fujoshi or maps produces the same effect. Both cases are a quite radical case of what I call “war on words” – attaching as much stigmatizing meanings to important labels of someone you dislike. Most maps don’t act sexually with kids, that’s a fact. Map advocates of social media co work with CSA preventing organizations and aid research. Most fujoshi don’t approach gay men inappropriately either. Many of them are not straight themselves and are well aware of how homophobia and dehumanization in media works. Yet both groups are stereotyped as sexual predators with zero sympathy for their victims. A bonus fact: as a part of posing every single m/m shipper as a fetishizing straight girl, antis erase the terms “fudanshi” and “fujin”, which is basically misgendering of male and nonbinary shippers.

Yet many fujoshi refuse to recognize the similarity. They speak up against misinformation and stigma that targets them, but believe the same things hurting maps are justified. For many of them it’s fear. There were many pro map shippers in 2017, but antis increased harassment, and by 2018 most simply dropped out. The blog called block-report-program, dedicated to documenting and reporting abuse from antis, is a good example of that. Initially they accepted the receipts of antimaps’ abuse that I provided, but ended up deleting the posts and blocking maps – not because maps did something wrong, but because antis made a scene. Some fujoshi, however, are sincerely mislead about maps and don’t seek to check their beliefs due to lack of critical thinking. I became convinced long ago that looking for unity with shippers is a dead end, they might be hurt by the same people, but the temptation to deflect that abuse and direct it towards us is too strong. Many freedom and civil rights movements end up finding someone more oppressed to toss to their abusers in attempts to uplift themselves (e.g., white women demanding voting rights and excluding black women, some gays and lesbians trying to deplatform trans people). As a strategy it doesn’t work, it’s basically “divide and conquer” by the divided’s own hands. But people walk into this trap over and over again, because they don’t learn from history.

So, two days ago Twitter banned my account. I figure I want to post here more, since I keep my WordPress for serious stuff and my Pixiv for drawings.

Here is one of my recent drawings, btw.

1. Do you want normalization of relationships with children/legalization of child pornography?

No. The community knows about the harm it does to children and wants to prevent such things from happening.

2. Do you want pedophilia to be included in LGBT?

No. Calling it a sexuality, which originates from medical papers (source: http://jaapl.org/content/42/4/404.full) is different from claiming that it is a LGBT sexuality.

3. Why don't you seek professional help instead of going to social media?

First of all, these things aren't mutually exclusive. A map can be in therapy and on different sites. Some therapists even encourage self expression through writing. Second, not for everyone therapy is an option. There are places where it's too expensive, inefficient, or unsafe. Third, not all maps need therapy, because not all maps have mental health problems (according to DSM-5, pedophilia in itself isn't one). And fourth, online map communities are essential for seeking out maps who do need therapy and helping them to get it.

4. Why do you insist on being on sites that allow minors?

Minors are often the risk demographic when it comes to committing sexual offenses against children. More than 35% CSA offenders are minors (source: http://www.unh.edu/ccrc/pdf/CV171.pdf), and the most prominent cluster of offenders is aged 12-14 (source: https://defendinnocence.org/5-facts-child-child-sexual-abuse/). So they do need a lesson on why younger children can't consent, and they do need to be aware of anti contact ideas, whether they are maps or no. As for minor maps, the most common age of realizing you are a map (and also the most common age of the first suicide attempt) is 14, so they need even more support ans care.

5. Doesn't interacting with minors break the anti contact rule?

No, as being anti contact means being against sexual and romantic relationships with children, and has nothing to do with social interactions.

6. Aren't you afraid that a map is going to snap and offend when being around minors?

No, snapping as a concept doesn't exist when it comes to CSA, because rape is something that takes preparation and a certain mindset. There were found brain differences between offenders and non offenders. In addition to that, social interactions with children decreased interest towards sex with children even in people who could have otherwise offended (source: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1GLKvyvTKbU6LBIVwzV_Ej7R_q1BZJqzz/view).

7. Why do you want maps to be proud of their attraction and feel positive about it instead of being ashamed?

Being unashamed doesn't mean being proud. We support accepting your attractions, because this is what doctors want (source: http://www.b4uact.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/Psychotherapy-for-the-MAP-2017.pdf), and it is known that stigma increases risks of offense (source: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-015-0503-7).

8. Won't positivity for anti contact maps encourage pro contacts?

No, as the community is known for seeking and removing pro cs from the space it occupies. Tumblr, which had a functioning map community for years, had less pro cs than other sites that don't have a strong anti contact movement.


For more information, read my WordPress post: https://wierstamann.wordpress.com/2018/08/22/common-misconceptions-about-maps

Several days ago a person who made a lot for tumblr map community to stop existing wrote to me on twitter. He said he's happy to see tumblr finally doing what he wanted it to do - destroying the community wholly. I have to agree, we lost tumblr, although I will keep making new accounts till it's all gone. But we didn't actually lose the community. We still have most of the people in chats on discord, on twitter, some - even here. We'll move on and rebuild, and we'll meet again everyone who fell behind. The internet is big enough to find a new place, and I refuse to regard loss of tumblr as a failure.